The Toad a la Mode League for the Suppression of Dangerous
Information is Honored
to Support the Following
Laws Proposed by Rick Santorum
For-profit weather service Accu-Weather is pleased as punch about Senator Rick Santorum's latest legislative
project: forbidding the National Weather Service from releasing its weather forecasts to the public. Santorum's next round of
legislative proposals would do the following:
Make all IRS information and tax forms available exclusively by private subscription to the Wall Street Journal.
Forbid the release of USRDA data except to owners and patrons of General Nutrition Center outlets.
Make U.S. Postal Service stamps available solely through hip, trendy self-service kiosks at all neighborhood Starbucks.
Limit the sale of beverages in government venues to PepsiCo products.
Authorize release of USGS data to no one but the American Automobile Association.
Require survivors of Iraq war fatalities to sing "God Bless America" before receiving official condolence letters.
Mandate "full service memberships" for anyone using official U.S. Weights and Measures. Non-paying members must estimate.
Release federal automobile crash test data to General Motors, which will redact those parts deemed
vital to national security.
Return to the Toad a la Mode menu for the low, low rate of $2.99 per month.
