Name:
Address and Phone:
Please list any distinguishing characteristic(s) Sir Paul can use to recognize/nickname you:


Do you own the album "Drivin' Rain"? __ yes __ no
Would you be willing to listen to it? __ yes __ no
How about if we paid you? __ yes __ no

Please be advised that this job has the following physical requirements:

• Lifting items weighing more than 30 pounds.
• Exposure to high-volume music for long periods.
• Standing and smiling for long periods.
• Repeated use of the "thumbs-up" sign.

Can you handle these requirements? __ yes __ no __ yes, if heavily sedated

Which of the following most closely describes how you would feel if you saw your aging father dance in public?

A. Glad he can still enjoy himself at his age.
B. Embarrassed for the old guy.

Which of the following most closely describes how you feel when you see an older, wealthy man with a girlfriend young enough to be his daughter?

A. Happy -- age means nothing when it comes to love.
B. Embarrassed for the old guy.

Please select one of the following:
A. La-la-la-la-laaaa
B. Lee-lee-lee-lee-leeee
C. Oo-oo-oo-ooooo

Do you eat meat?
A. I am a vegan.
B. I enjoy consuming sentient beings and fostering the continued heinous practices of the blood-money meat production and packing industry.

Are you qualified to perform the following functions? __ yes __ no __ only in Mexico

• Administer CPR.
• Safely transport and monitor the flow of therapeutic oxygen.
• Immobilize a broken hip.

Please select your favorite set list from among the following:

A. "Strawberry Fields Forever," "Imagine," "Norwegian Wood"
B. "Here Comes the Sun," "Something," "Taxman"
C. "Why Don't We Do It in the Road," "Rocky Raccoon," "Silly Love Songs"

Please be advised that your interviewer will evaluate whether you can convincingly deliver the following phrases:

• "Sir, you're better than ever!"
• "No, I wasn't cringing. I was feeling the music down to my soul. You truly moved me, sir."
• "That's fabulous, sir. I smell another hit!"
• "Yes, officer, that's my marijuana."