Executive Summary Thank you for engaging Lamb, Curry & Rice P.C. to conduct the audit of www.toadalamode.com. As your auditors, it is our goal to reduce the potential for comedy fraud and to help you increase your Hilaritron Indexed Comedy Rating (ICR).

On the whole, our audit found www.toadalamode.com to be amusing and non-fraudulent. We must, however, note our concern over the smarty-pants nature of many of your pieces. In addition, several items could be construed as snide and/or bitter. These overtones score well with two of your key demographics -- unjustly convicted felons and graduate students -- but could be detrimental in less homogeneous markets.

To broaden the appeal of www.toadalamode.com and boost your Hilaritron rating, Lamb, Curry & Rice proposes the following changes:

Recommended Actions

1. Increase the use of alliteration. It's a well-known comedy fact that alliteration is funny. Just consider these phrases: "Wacky Wednesday," "lecherous lion," and "Barbara Bush."
2. To ensure that visitors don't miss your latest material, insert eye-catching, revolving "NEW" icons next to new menu items.
3. Your restaurant/menu concept could be confusing to some. We suggest adding the following phrase to the top of your front page: "Welcome to Toad a la Mode, a comedy Web site. Please feel free to read our comedy."
4. Consider adding a "Humorous Thought for the Week" that is touching and thought-provoking as well as funny.
5. Tom Hanks and Katharine Hepburn are national treasures. Don't use them in any more pieces. You can't go wrong by focusing on the comedy-writers' mainstays of Tom Arnold (what's his talent?) and Cher (plastic surgery, younger men).
6. Introduce a flamboyantly gay character who will make us laugh while teaching us about tolerance and love.
7. Bring in the kids with references to hip-hop, Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys and/or 'N Sync. (NOTE: First determine whether Backstreet Boys and 'N Sync are the same group.)
8. Create more humorous lists of the differences between men and women. For example, "Why can men run multi-national corporations but they can't put down a toilet seat?" and "Why do women always go to the restroom in pairs?" At the end of these lists, suggest that your readers e-mail them to all of their friends.
9. Add more Elvis-related humor.
10. Stop being such smarty-pantses.